Wednesday, April 25, 2007

the change

We had a meeting at school this morning. The principal told us that at the LPS (that would be Lawton, for those of you that don't know) principal's breakfast, their guest speaker was the head of the gang task force for the police department. He let them know that there are 110 active gangs in Lawton, some living just blocks from each other. There are two in our school's neighborhood that they know of. They have taken over a majority of the city streets and buildings, leaving their tags behind on whatever will stand still. They have taken over Lawton's mall, and they can't do anything about it unless they get violent there. They can harrass customers all they want at all times of day/evening. Their very existence is changing the makeup of our children at school. They come to school extremely wise to the ways of the streets. The children's parents don't supervise them, so they're allowed to roam the neighborhood. We had a group of kids come up to the school at about 8 PM the other night, and start throwing rocks at a mentally challenged boy, calling him retarded and other choice names. The boy got so upset that he went home, got a BB gun, and put it up to one of the girls' heads. And somehow, in the midst of all this, we're supposed to put what they're exposed to outside of our classrooms aside and teach them what they need to know. We find ourselves teaching them everyday things, like remembering to use a napkin at lunch time, wipe around their mouths... not to chew with their mouths open... how to use loving words towards each other instead of mean words... we have to tell them to bathe at night and use deodorant every day because someone at home (or the lack of someone at home) hasn't taught them that. It feels, literally, like pushing a big boulder up a steep hill. But we do it anyway, because it's what we were called to do. I hope that we can teach them enough to stop all of these horrible problems in this city one day, because Lord knows the grown-ups aren't doing anything about it for them.

"The Change"
by Garth Brooks
One hand
Reaches out
And pulls a lost soul from harm
While a thousand more go unspoken for
They say what good have you done
By saving just this one
It's like whispering a prayer
In the fury of a storm
And I hear them saying you'll never change things
And no matter what you do it's still the same thing
But it's not the world that I am changing
I do this so this world will know
That it will not change me
This heart
Still believes
The love and mercy still exist
While all the hatred rage and so many say
That love is all but pointless in madness such as this
It's like trying to stop a fire
With the moisture from a kiss
And I hear them saying you'll never change things
And no matter what you do it's still the same thing
But it's not the world that I am changing
I do this so this world will know
That it will not change me
As long as one heart still holds on
Then hope is never really gone
I hear them saying you'll never change things
And no matter what you do it's still the same thing
But it's not the world that I am changing
I do this so this world we know
Never changes me
What I do is so
This world will know
That it will not change me

Sunday, April 01, 2007

baby update....about month 5

I don't know if anybody reads this, but I figured I'd update it anyway.

I am somewhere between 19 and 21 weeks pregnant. They've changed my due date about 23409 skillion times... okay, twice. But still. Right now they're kinda banking on August 24th, which stinks because it used to be August 8th.

And I'm having a boy.

And his name is James Michael III. He's named after his dad and grandpa.

And we're buying a house. And I'm nervous about that.

But it's a cute house in a good neighborhood, and that's hard to find in Lawton.

Medical bills are no bueno.

I guess now I need to save up for some new furniture...cuz buying a new house but having the same furniture is not that much fun. And I need to decide on the theme in his room.

My body is weird and hasn't gained any weight yet... although I am showing, and I feel like a cow.

I guess that's about it.