Friday, December 31, 2010

My year

January 2010.
~Rang in the New Year in the hospital recovering from my c-section. Started getting a fever, which turned into my incision site being opened back up (gross).

~Stayed at the Ronald McDonald House for 3 weeks. Three. Long. Weeks.

~ Brought my lovely baby home and reunited my family on January 26th.

~Had an ice storm that knocked out the power for a few hours overnight on the 29th.

February 2010.
~Celebrated my 30th birthday by being home with my two boys solo for the first time. Loved every minute of it.

~Took D to his pediatrician here in Lawton, who thought he looked very jaundiced still. She tested his blood and found out that it was his direct bilirubin that was high (very dangerous for the liver.)

~Got readmitted to Children's in OKC on February 13th.

~Lots of tests run, lots of blood drawn, lots of blood transfused, and Dylan was released at 10:30PM on February 19th.

March 2010.
~ D started March out with a cold and a nasty cough, which I was scared would get us put BACK into the hospital. He got over it with no problems, though, thank God.

~D got the Synagis shot, which insurance tried not to pay for. But I stabbed them with a fork and a knife. Okay, I didn't, but I did fill out friggin paperwork and they paid all but $20 of it. :)

~ Celebrated (?) our first World Down syndrome Day.

~ That dummy Jesse James cheated on Sandra Bullock! (I wouldn't have remembered that it happened in March if I weren't a bored-pants back then and BLOGGED ABOUT IT. Yeah.

~ Little M entertained me daily with his silly sayings and ever-expanding vocabulary. I guess I could pretty much put that on every month, though.

April 2010.
~Had a great Easter with my little family!

~Had some bouts with some minor depression as I realized that having a baby with special needs actually chases some of your dearest friends away. Luckily, it also brings you closer to people who used to just be acquaintences.

~D FINALLY smiled a true, reactive smile this month! Then he got blood drawn that same day. Poor sweetie!

May 2010.
~ More of the same... still realizing that some people suck at life.

~ Lots of tornadoes hit Oklahoma.

~Made a decision to stay at home (which later didn't work out).

June 2010.
~Celebrated being with my hubby for 9 years!

~Started realizing that surviving financially without me working was probably not going to happen.

~Blogged about Kim Kardashian making breastfeeding comments that didn't make me happy.

~Celebrated D's half-birthday!

July 2010.
~Had a lovely 4th of July with our beautiful family and my in-laws.

~Had some crazy shenanigans go down in my 'hood. Read here.

~Celebrated 5 years of wedded bliss on the 8th. :)

~Started noticing that the Horrible Threes were quickly taking over the Terrible Twos in the bigger boy.

~Watched a Corpse Flower bloom via webcam, which little M lovingly called the Stinky Fwower.

~Finally decided that I had to go back to work so we could live and, you know, eat and stuff.

August 2010.
~Little M got his very first haircut. He cried the entire time it was going on, and then demanded a sucker afterwards. haha

~Since I decided to go back to work, I got moved to a new school and to a new grade. I was scared and sad at the time.

~Had the first day of school from... well, you probably know.

~My precious little M turned 3 this month!

~I had to give up breastfeeding because my supply went WAY down when I started back to work. :( Breastfeeding/Pumping for 8 months was an accomplishment that I was super proud of, considering how hard it was to NOT have success the first time at all, and for D not to be a good sucker. I wish I could have made it longer.

September 2010.
~D's OT moved away, so he got a new one. We like them both.

~Found out my Papaw had cancer. He decided that he didn't want treatment and that he didn't want to die in a hospital, so my mom and her brothers took care of him at home.

~Papaw passed away September 30th.

October 2010.
~My sweet IRL friend Stacey's brother (and my darling jr. high English teacher's son)'s wife had a baby with HLHS. Here is Emma Janae's blog.

~The boys had an awesome time Trick-or-Treating this year! Dylan was the Tin Man, and little M was Super Why.

November 2010.
~Took D to an opthamologist, who said his eyes and optic nerves were great!

~Took both boys to the pediatrician, who said D was fat and little M needed speech therapy.

~Took little M to a speech pathologist (my friend Bonnie) who said that no, he did not need speech therapy.

~Had a great Thanksgiving with both sides of our family.

December 2010.
~Got frustrated with trying to pottytrain little M. (I could have pretty much written THAT on each month too.)

~Wrote a letter to our NICU, thanking them for taking good care of D and us while we were up there for a month.

~Had awesome Christmas celebrations at home (Santa spoiled the boys!), at Auntie Tina's house (The in-laws spoiled the boys!), and at Nana's house (my side spoiled the boys!) ALL IN ONE DAY. *whew*

~Dylan turned one and I cried.

~Had a wonderful new year's eve celebration with my family!!

Hope you had a great year too!! 2010 kicked 2009's hiney, for sure... don't forget to eat your blackeye peas for good luck in the year 2011! :) God bless you all, and thank you for reading my blog this year.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

The post in which I cry while I type

Dear Dylan,

Oh, my sweet, dear Dylan. Today, you are a year old. 365 days. 12 months. What can I say? You have changed us. It took 29 years to build me into me, and it took ONE year for you to change me completely.

I remember driving up to Oklahoma City the afternoon that you decided was your birthday. I remember touching my tummy and thinking, "this is it... you're coming to the outside. Life is going to be so much different now." You see, I loved you then... but I was a little scared of you. Scared of what you were NOT going to be able to do. Scared of what health problems you were going to have. Scared that other people wouldn't accept you. Oh, little baby boy. I don't say that with a happy heart-- I look at you now, and I think, "WHY was I scared of this perfect angel?" But I was. I didn't know what to expect.

Until 6:37PM, when you came out screaming. I didn't get to see you immediately, but Daddy did. He said "He's SO tiny! But he looks... I don't know, like a regular baby!" I know he couldn't find his wording, but I knew what he meant. He meant the same thing I was thinking... you looked like someone familiar to us. You looked like your big brother... you looked a little like Daddy... but you mostly looked like me. You had a perfect, c-section, never-been-in-the-birth-canal head. You had one small sprig of blond hair sticking up. Oh, you were so gorgeous. It was love at first sight... my tiny little 5-lb baby. I don't think I stopped smiling that night at all. And even though you were a couple of floors above me in the NICU, I felt good that you were so healthy looking and so BIG compared to the other babies (although 5 lbs is not big!)

Suddenly, who cared about Down syndrome anymore? Not us! You weren't Down syndrome, like we had been preparing ourselves for you to be. You were DYLAN. You were the whole, and Down syndrome just became a tiny sliver of you. I felt so silly for worrying for all of those months. We loved you immediately. We wanted you from the moment we found out you were coming. We got sidetracked down the scared path when we found out you were to have a chromosomal abnormality. We got back on track the moment you came in to this world. We haven't looked back since... well, maybe a peek or two, when we see other kids your age doing things you're not doing YET. But you will, my darling kid. You will. You're not that kid-- you're not Down syndrome-- you're Dylan.

And, Dylan, you are a special little boy!! People are blown away by how chill you are. Perfect strangers are drawn to your calm demeanor. Family members can't wait for their turn to hold you and experience you, because you just radiate beauty and wonder. You have the power to bury yourself deep into people's hearts-- you've done this all throughout this year! You are a joy. A joy, plain and simple.

Little man, you know what you want, and everybody knows that it's Dylan's Way or The Highway. :) If a new skill isn't your idea, you flat out won't do it, and in fact will get a bit upset if someone tries to MAKE you do it. But if it IS your idea? Look out, world!

This month, you've learned to clap by yourself! You wave hi and bye. You have a happy noise... I don't know how to type it out, but it's your "I'm happy and content" sound. You've added "Nana" and "papa" to your babble-list, but still no Mama! You eat so well, moving quickly through to stage 2 and 3 babyfoods. You are all over the place! You proved that you CAN sit up on your own IF you feel like it, which isn't very often at all. Your brother is your biggest fan and playmate. You can point out my nose (but not your own). You're going through a "hold me and never put me down" phase. You give kisses on cheeks... with tongue. haha. You're my handsome little wiggleworm, and I am just SO blessed. There's just no better word for it. Blessed.

You, at an hour or so old, December 29, 2009.

You, chillin' in your crib when you should have been napping, December 2010.

Happy birthday, my darling. Thank you for changing our world. May all of your years be as blessed as you've made this one for us.

Saturday, December 25, 2010

What Tired Looks Like

This is the very end of a 3-Christmases-Celebration Day. And yes, little M's head is covered. That's the only way he'll fall asleep. Strange, I know. :) And that's my mom snoozing away with them.

Merry Christmas, sweet blogger friends!

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

D's crazy hair and other randomage

Can we talk about this boy's hair for a minute?

I just love my little man's Alfalfa sprig. That sprig of hair is all he was born with. Except back then it was blond, and it's getting darker and darker by the day. And longer and longer. There's no secret-- my children are not great hair-growers. It took little M FOREVER to finally start growing his locks, and he STILL has the old-man-receding-hairline thing going on in the front. Dylan is no different... although his is more of a tall-forehead than the old-man-receding-hairline. Except his alfalfa sprig. It stands tall and proud and lets the world know, HEY, I'm not a COMPLETE baldy!

I just love, love, love this kid.

I also love, love, love the other kid I have too... the one that sits in his carseat in the back seat and barks out driving orders... ya know, since I haven't been driving for *coughs a number* years. His main driving "advice" is "There's the red octagon!! Stop the car!! Mommy stop the car now!!" All the way down the street. On every.single.street. This also applies to stop lights... same command, just "light" where "octagon" is. *sigh*

I stayed up very late last night wrapping presents. Yep, I procrastinated til now. It's all done now, though. Anyway, Dylan slept in (til TEN IN THE MORNING... bless you, child!), so I thought I could possibly sleep in too. Oh, no... the big one? Up with the roosters. I still thought I could manage a little bit of extra snooze time... until he brought me my cell phone, saying "this thing is making too much noise." I saw that it was a missed call from big M, so I called him back... APPAAAARENTLY, someone I know, who shall remain nameless *little M* called his daddy on my cell phone. *sigh*... I'd let him call my entire address book if it meant getting a few extra minutes of sleep this morning, except little M's been listening to lots of the 9-1-1 commercials lately, and I'm CERTAIN that'll be his next crank call. I love how stinking smart he is, but it's gonna get us all in trouble one day!

We're super excited for Santa to come in three more sleeps. Little M and I are going to bake him some delicious cookies, make a... um... well, interesting gingerbread house (we've opted to just use graham crackers, so we'll see how we do. haha..). Of course, the little dudes have matching PJs, so that'll be darling. I hope I remember to take lots of pictures, but I shall not promise anything, since I'm notorious for forgetting to take pictures during the important stuff of my kids' lives. *sigh*

We really, really hope you all have a Merry Christmas! Christ our Savior is born! :)

Thursday, December 09, 2010

A letter

I took a lesson from my bloggy friend Jenny and wrote a thank-you letter to the NICU where Dylan lived his first month of life. You see, I didn't THINK the feelings would hit me. I've been pretty even-keeled when it comes to my feelings about Down syndrome... but one thing I have NOT been so easy-going about is those feelings I had while Dylan was in the hospital. It is absolutely petrifying to live life not knowing what the next day is going to bring. I am a total comfort-zone type of person, and when my comfort-zone is being challenged... well, how I react really depends on the situation. My husband and I handled it the best that we could. There were mornings that we both woke up crying because we didn't want to be in the Ronald McDonald House anymore. We didn't want to be without our 2-year-old. We didn't want to go out in the cold, eat out (or in a hospital cafeteria.. or in the RMH kitchen) anymore. We wanted our family back to normal so badly, and all we could do was cry. There were evenings when we were so drained from the entire experience, all we could do was bicker. There were days where exhaustion set in, and all we could do was laugh. It felt inappropriate, but we had to. We had to survive how we knew how.

Dylan had the very best care imaginable in the NICU. He had awesome nurses, top-notch doctors, and nearly everyone we encountered was nice. They made a crappy situation tolerable. I wanted to thank them in person-- big M was not ready for that. I totally understand... we DID go IN the hospital a few days ago (Dylan had an appointment up there in their physicians building... we wanted to check out their new construction, since we haven't seen it in a year. It looks awesome!), but we didn't go to the NICU floor. So we decided that mailing our letter would be best. It is on the way to them now. I gave them this blog address to look at pictures of Dylan if they wanted to (so hi to all the OUMC staff that might stop by! :) ).

I don't think there's any way I could say "thank you" enough. Our guy is healthy, happy, and wonderful, and it's because he had such an awesome start.

**I guess I could actually post the letter, since I have access to it now. Don't tell anybody I wrote the other post at work. I will deny it. *ahem*

To the Doctors, Nurses, and staff in the NICU:

“Long after people forget what you said or did, they will remember how you made them feel.”

My name is Amy C*********. My son was born December 29th, 2009, at OU Medical Center, Children’s Hospital. He has Down syndrome, and he was born with doudenal atresia. He lived his first month of life in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit at your hospital.

This year has been a long one in some ways, dealing with Dylan’s diagnosis and getting his health stabilized. In other ways, the year has flown by. It seems like only yesterday, your doctors, nurses, and staff were like our family away from home.

I’m writing this letter to thank you. Thank you so much for the outstanding care our son received. Thank you for taking care of his needs and ours. My husband and I felt like our world was starting to crumble in on us, having to stay away from our home and our then-2-year-old for so long. You really took good care of us in that time, making us feel welcome to stay in our son’s room during the day and making us feel involved in his care.

Now, I know you probably don’t remember us. It is a sad fact that you get a ton of babies in your intensive care unit, and I can only imagine how many you’ve seen since you saw Dylan. You might remember my husband in all of his Texas Longhorns gear, but that’s a different story. :) But the point is– you don’t remember us, but we remember you. And we always will. We remember sweet Jessica. She was Dylan’s very first NICU nurse on his very first night outside of the womb. We remember Kristen, who was great with Dylan and helped me get situated with pumping in Dylan’s NICU room. We remember Nicole, who was one of our favorites, along with Mary, Tiffany, Jennifer, and Ann. We remember Blake and Jena, and how they played music to our boy. We remember some of his night NICU staff too, even if we can’t remember everybody’s names. :) We remember Bonnie, Janie (who had to put up with me bawling twice. Sorry about that! heh), and the other Nurse Practitioners. We remember Kris, the lactation consultant, and how well she got us set up to give our son the best start in life. We remember the young ones at the front desk and how sweet they were. We remember Dr. Sheldon, Dr. Dannaway, and Dr. Gottipati, and how much help they were to us when he had questions. We remember the Pediatric Surgery team and how wonderful they were too.

Thank you for knowing that, when parents are in the throes of NICU life, it is important to make them feel okay about their situation. Thank you for training your nurses and staff to be compassionate and to field questions they’ve answered a million times over like they don’t mind explaining it again. Thank you for the tiring work that you do. I can only imagine how often your heart must break up there, dealing with sick babies or worse.

Dylan thanks you too, as he’s a healthy, happy almost-1-year-old now. He has a little hair, no teeth, but lots of chunk-rolls (thanks again, Kris!). He is learning to hit his milestones at Dylan-pace. He is such a wonderful baby. And he’s here, healthy and beautiful and wonderful, in part because of you guys. Thank you.

Amy, Michael, and Dylan C********

Saturday, December 04, 2010

Adventures in Pottytraining

See this kid? This kid is 3 years old. This kid, at 2 years, 11 months, potty trained himself. This same kid regressed completely back in to Pull-ups when I had to go back to work. This kid? Knows EVERYTHING there is to know about potty-training. Everything. He can feel when he needs to potty. If you ask him where he's supposed to go peepee and poopoo, he'll say "In the potty. Not in my underwear or Pull-ups!" If you ask him what he should say if he feels like he needs to peepee or poopoo, he'll say, "I'll say, Moooommmmyyyy, I need to go Pottttyyyyyy." If he is wearing underwear, and he pees and poops on them, he'll say "Uh oh, I guess *insert character here* is going to cry now." Yep. We've tried guilt trips. In fact, we've tried bribery, telling him all of the people he knows that go potty in the potty, letting him watch US go to the bathroom, etc.

Conclusion? I do believe I will be packing Pull-ups in my son's care package for college. *sigh*

We're open to suggestions. He WILL sit on the potty. He's not afraid. Like I said, he was potty trained before I went back to work. So, your suggestions? We've probably tried that. But let's hear 'em anyway! :)

Monday, November 29, 2010

11 months

Dear Dylan,

I can't believe that in a mere month, you are going to be a year old. I just don't even know where all the time has gone. I can't believe that a year ago, I was anxiously awaiting your arrival. You were crowding my right side because that's where you loved to nestle. You didn't move much... rather, you were probably moving fine, but I had so much amniotic fluid that I couldn't feel you.
So, what are you up to these days?

~At your last doctor's appointment, you weighed 17 lbs and some ounces. I'm preeeetty sure you're going through a growth spurt right now, because you have been gobbling everything in sight, so you probably weigh more than that now!

~Oh yes, my friend, you have been eating like mad! You never showed interest in eating until this point, but now you want to taste EVERYTHING. This past weekend alone, you tasted a biscuit from Cracker Barrel and some shredded Monteray-Jack cheese. That is on top of regular ol' baby food!

~You're getting stronger every day, too. You're not sleeping as much, you're flip-flopping out of diaper changes... gone are the days of my content little munchkin sitting still for diaper and clothes changes!

~Speaking of which, you still wear 6-9 month clothes and size 3 diapers.

~You went to your first Festival of Lights this past Friday. You missed Christmas by a mere 4 days last year, (and then of course you were in the hospital for a month, so the Christmas lights were all gone by the time you got to see daylight.. or should I say nighttime) so this was something special for you! You were all bundled up, and we laughed and laughed at how you yelled at the lights in the park!

~You are still sweet and loveable, but the stubbornness shows itself quite often too. You still refuse to sit up unless it's your idea. And in fact, you've decided that tightening up your entire body and refusing to bend and yelling is the best way to NOT have to sit up!

~You're making more and more noises... but still no "mama." Although sometimes you will sign it. It's probably just an accident more than anything, but hey... I'll take it!

~We love you more each and every single day.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

I don't write about Ds often.

Maybe it's because I don't think about it very often. Oh, it has changed me. It has changed my entire family, in fact. We are more sensitive people now because of Down syndrome. But I don't think about it often.

I don't always "see" Down syndrome when I look at my son. I see myself (my lips, my chin...), I see my husband (his cheeks, especially)... I see my beautiful son. But I don't "see" Down syndrome often.

I realize it's there. Oh, I've realized that since the moment I found out at around 24 weeks gestation. It was a huge, scary monster to me back then. It was a curse to me. A "why me? Why US?" But it isn't anymore. I can see that my child is delayed, and I know that's all "part of it," but I'm not worried. Ds is just a tiny part of the whole. But I do realize it's there.

When I read other Ds blogs, there are times when I just can't relate to the feelings. And then there are times when I can. And there are times when I can't relate to what their children are going through. And then there are times when I can. And there are times when I can't relate because MY child isn't doing as well as theirs. And then there are times when I read a blog about a child that is the same as Dylan. Don't get me wrong... there are several Ds blogs that I read (when I have time to read blogs, that is) that I just adore. But I don't always relate.

Is this normal? Am I in some weird form of denial? Do I have to respond a certain way to our new normal? The answers are yes, no, and absolutely not, respectively.

I'm writing this down because I'm hoping that someone out there will feel the way I do and stop feeling badly about not feeling badly enough. Or stop feeling wrong about not worrying about Down syndrome all the time. I'm writing this because we ALL have our own journeys in this... we write them so we can vent and just in case anybody can relate. It's not a competition or a contest. It's our lives, and we live them the best way we know how. And the way I know how to live my life is just to live it. To deal with the feelings as they come, and to be okay with the fact that I am responding how I'm responding.

That is why I don't write about Ds often.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Dylan's boo boo face, FTW

How can we EVER say no to this face?

Spoiler alert: We can't.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Dear Pediatrician,

A letter to my sons' pediatrician:

Dear Dr.,

Remember when you said that little M had 4 months to clear up his speech or you would recommend testing/therapy for him?! You know, after you had known him for all of 5 minutes? (If even.) Yeah, well... I'm the type of mother that, when you plant that seed of doubt in me, I will worry and worry and worry about it til I'm a nervous wreck. Luckily for us, I happen to have a friend who is a speech pathologist. Her name's Bonnie. Or Dr. Bonnie, as I like to call her. Which is not a joke, since she does, in fact, have the title Dr. in front of her name. And she and I (and our friends Lori and Leilani) went out to eat last Sunday. And Bonnie sat beside my 3-year-old and talked to him. And about oh, 5 minutes into the conversation (that's about how long YOU gave him, right?), she looked at me and said, "oh, you have NOTHING to worry about. His speech is MORE than just FINE." The difference here, Dr.? Bonnie knows a thing or two about speech. Bonnie also knows my child. She also understands that 1) there's a baby in the house, so baby talk is frequently used, and he's a good imitator. 2) Little M's grandmother watches him during the day, and his grandmother is Korean. Little M doesn't know very many Korean words, but again, he's a good imitator. 3) Little M loves the sound of his own voice and loves to be the middle of the conversation, the center of attention, and hates to be left out. (Which is what *I* thought all along.)

I'm writing you this letter that you'll never see, unless you're stalking my blog somehow, because I really think you should, I don't know, get to know your patients better before scaring parents?? I'm nobody special... but I know people who are somebody special. Like Bonnie. Dr. Bonnie. Who made a good week or more of worry go away with a 5-minute speech assessment.

I will continue to use you as our pediatrician for now, because you're great with Dylan and his issues. But watch it.

Sincerely yours,

M and D's Mommy

PS: Thank you, Bonnie, for listening to little M talk... and talk, he does a lot of! Oh, and letting him pat your leg. lol


A huge, sincere thank you to all the men and women who have proudly served our country. Thank you for the freedom to write this gripy letter I've written today. Thank you to my grandpa, the late John (Bud) Sweeney; my papaw, the late Monroe Mitchell; and my father-in-law, Mike Culbertson, for doing your part to keep us safe.

Saturday, November 06, 2010

Because I don't ever want to forget...

A few days ago we had to go grocery shopping. Shopping near the first of the month is always a blast, no? Anyway, I needed to get some new Band-aids, as the three-year-old 1) gets boo boos quite often, and 2) loves bandaids. So I figured I would let him pick out what kind he wanted. As we strolled down the aisle, we saw Cars (one of his favorite movies ever), Spiderman, Transformers... all these "boy" bandaids that I thought he would love. But my child had something different in mind.
This is what my child picked.

...and the first words out of his mouth when we got home were, "Where are the Dora bandaids??" He had a scratch on his chest that he wanted to cover up with a Dora bandaid.

Unfortunately, he seems to be a little allergic to the adhesive on the bandaids (gets that from dear-ol'-mom, as I'm allergic to several types of adhesive), so we might have to get a different brand in the future. But I don't mind that he picked Dora. Daddy peppered the shopping basket with some Hot Wheels cars, but he does that every time, so I don't think he was doing it to combat the Dora. The Dora bandaids' outlines are in pink, but nobody here cares. He's 3. And it's adorable that of all the things he could pick, that's what he wanted. :)


In other news, it's my mom's birthday today.

This is my mom. (Gorgeous, yes?) She is probably THE best woman I know. She is so strong... no matter what she's going through, she comes out on top. She is a loving, caring person.. she was a devoted daughter to both of her parents, and was essentially the hospice nurse for both of them. I know it gave them both such comfort to be in the care of their only daughter, the best nurse ever, in their final days on Earth. How iron-clad you would have to be to be Nurse Daughter instead of getting to be Grieving Daughter in those days, but she did so with no complaint. My mom loves her children, her 9 grandchildren, and her daughter-and-sons-in-law with all her heart and soul. I could sit here for hours typing (one handed with a wiggly 10 month old in the other hand..hehe..) about all the sacrifices she made for us. She was a parent of 5 young children on her own. And I think we all turned out pretty awesome!

Happy birthday, my sweet, wonderful mom. You deserve all the riches in the world... but I hope a blog entry suffices. hehe. I love and respect you beyond measure.

Tuesday, November 02, 2010


Today was long and eventful. Dylan and I started our morning bright and early with an 8AM appointment with opthamology. I pretty much asked to be referred to the opthamologist for Dylan because D's geneticist said he should have his eyes checked within the first year. So when the opthamologist started asking why I felt D needed to be there, it was all I could do to not say "Your guess is as good as mine, lady." Anyway, the opthamologist was very nice... she said that Dylan has a severe case of "cutie pie"... but other than that, his optic nerves look great. She said he's "just the right amount of far-sighted for his age." So no super cute glasses for the boy at this point, but that's okay! I'm feeling blessed that his eyes are great!

Daddy and little M joined us shortly after the opthamology appointment, because both boys had check-ups with the pediatrician. It should be known that little M had never seen this particular pediatrician before... and, in fact, he hadn't been to any pediatrician in over a year because he's just a super healthy kid. (Thank God for that). It should also be known that little M? LOVES LOVES LOVES to jibber-jabber. I think if you've read this blog any amount of time, you'll know that little M has always been a pretty good talker. He says zany, off-the-wall things every single day. Sure, sometimes he talks fast or mumbly and you can't understand every word he says every single time he says them, but most of the time you can understand him perfectly. Except when he's speaking Michaelese. My child has been a champion babbler since birth, practically, and it's a skill he has chosen not to completely give up yet. I suspect it's because he LOVES the sound of his own voice (and hates to be left out of conversation, but doesn't always have the "words" to join the conversation). SO, when Dr. S came in, little M decided that it would be a good time to babble at her. And so this doctor, not educated in the ways of little M, told me that she was giving him 4 months to clear up his speech because by now he should be talking more clearly than that. *sigh*... I just smiled and said "he can talk just fine. WHEN HE WANTS TO." In a little bit, he wasn't paying attention to her anymore, and he started talking about something that was going on out of the window... and using full sentences... and talking clearly. So then she was like "oh, so he CAN talk plainly when he wants to." Yup, lady. (PS: I would have refused any testing or intervention for him anyway. *I* know he can talk just fine.)

Oh, and guess who's "chunky" and we need to make sure he doesn't "get so fat"? Welcome to the world of Dr. S. *sigh* lol

I still like her though. She's an acquired taste, for sure, but I do like her. Plus she thinks Dylan is our miracle baby... and she's right about that. :)

So anywho, on to their stats: Little M weighs 35 lbs (75th percentile) and is 3 ft 2 inches (49th percentile). Dylan is 17 lbs 3 oz (50th percentile on the Ds scale, less than 3rd percentile on the regular scale), and 26.5 inches (25th percentile on the Ds scale, less than 3rd percentile on the regular scale). So apparently I grow 'em short and stubby. :)

Apparently little M's old pediatrician's office let little M get 2 shots behind on his immunizations. So he got the 2 shots today. He did pretty good for someone who doesn't even remember the last time he had to have shots. He only cried for a short moment... just until she put the bandaids on his legs. Because bandaids? His FAVORITE THINGS EVER. Oh, and he had the flu-mist or whatever it is. The up-his-nose one. Dylan only had his first round of flu shot. Lucky ducky!

(Stop right here: Yes, I choose to immunize my children. No, I don't care if you don't immunize yours. To each his/her own. Nope, we're not gonna debate about it. If you're parenting your children the best way you know how, you're doing it right. Thanks!)

Oh, and today I voted. I hope you did too. Because if you didn't, you can't complain. :)

Saturday, October 30, 2010

To make up for the pictureless post...

10 months... 20 minutes late.

My guy turned 10 months old today yesterday. I don't even have an updated picture to put on this post.. but I've had a monthly post for him nearly every month since he's been here, so why stop now?

You are still in 6/9 month clothes and size 3 diapers.

We don't know how much you weigh... even though you're 10 months old now, your "9 month" well-baby visit is on November 2. That's your mommy for ya!

You also have opthamology coming up the same day. I'm anxious to hear about your eyes!

You just started jumping in your jumparoo. By "jumping," I mean more small bouncing, but it's progress! You seem to be gaining more and more energy every single day!

I'm anxious to find out if your iron levels have come back up since your last bloodwork. Since your last bloodwork, you've switched from breastmilk to formula (fortified with iron), and you've been on iron supplements (when I remember to give them to you. Sorry. Your mommy is quite forgetful when she's busy juggling 230498 balls in the air during the day. Please forgive me!)

You have a bit of a cold, which I always hate. I'm hoping you get through it with no problems. So far you've had such good health, minus a little cold here and there. I'd hate to break our streak, so let's just leave it at this little sniffles and small cough, k? :)

You have been making your big brother laugh SO MUCH lately!! You like to clap your feet like they're hands, and that makes M laugh hysterically every single time! I think you love to make your brother laugh... I think the sound of it fuels you to clap your feet more and more! I love watching you two play together.

Ten months, Dylan. Ten whole months since I gave birth to you. Ten months since I waited (im)patiently for the feeling to come back in my legs so I could go up to the NICU and get a good look at your sweet little features. Ten months since I fell so deeply, madly in love with my second son... a love I didn't know I could have for anybody on this planet (other than your brother).. a love I didn't know I had room for, since I love your brother that much too. Ten months since you changed our lives forevermore. Ten months since we saw your sweet little sprig of blond hair.

Thank you for making my heart more full than I realized it could be.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Just Because

Just because I think they're beautiful and funny and wonderful and amazing.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

hodgepodge and stuff

There's an OBGYN that is stalking my facebook page.

Well, okay... it's really an advertisement for her fan page (or whatever they're called these days). It shows up on my facebook home page. She's an OBGYN in Duncan, OK... a good 30 miles away. People seem to really like her, and she looks like a nice lady. BUT-- I've never met her before in my life, and still she haunts my FB. I dunno... For me, it's a little, um.. different.. for an OBGYN to have a fan page. I mean, I liked all of my doctors (except one) with both of my boys... but considering I still get all little-kid-who-sees-her-teacher-at-the-store-and-gets-super-shy-and-embarrassed when I see my doctors in public who have seen my nether-regions, I just don't know that I could comfortably socialize, online or otherwise, with one. Maybe my newer doctor. She's pretty awesome.

But anywho.

The Dylanator had his therapy today. (sidenote: I don't know if it's "occupational therapy" anymore... Kelli [his previous provider] was an occupational therapist. This lady's title is something different... so I guess I'll just call it Therapy Until Proven Otherwise. Or ThUPO. :) Kidding. I'll just call it therapy.) ANYWAY.. today's therapy session went AWESOME. Dylan was not nearly as stubborn as he usually is. He sat propped with her, picked things up, showed off his newfound love for toys, showed off his newfound love for grabbing Puffs out of my hand and trying to get them into his mouth, ANDDDD... Miss Cheryl (the new provider) got him up on all fours for quite a while!!! I was amazed and how well he did and how much he tolerated. I think he could have made it a few more minutes too (he usually pegs out at about 30 minutes), but little M was being rowdy and making TONS of noise, and D got overstimulated. But still, it was a really great session.

Baby Emma (from my previous post) had the first in her series of surgeries on Monday. She did swimmingly and came through like a champ. Praise God for that!

School is... well, it is. I'm getting more acquainted with the primary way of thinking, although it's quite the adjustment for me. I still feel like I'm an intermediate teacher at heart, but I value new experiences. I know there's a reason I am where I am this year.... noooowwww to figure out what that reason is. hehe. I kid.


The school itself is good, though. I like my coworkers, and the principal is awesome.




Disgus-ging. (disgusting)


Dad: What color is the sky?

M: Yellow.

Dad: No, the sky is blue.

M: No, it's YELLOW. You calm down. It's still YELLOW.


That's pretty much all I know at this point. :)

Sunday, October 03, 2010

A prayer request

For someone who thought about quitting blogging, I sure have had a lot to say this week. heh... well, they've been important things (to me, anyway), so I guess that's a-okay.

I do have a request. You see, my Junior High English teacher's son and his wife are expecting a sweet new addition to their family tomorrow (Monday). Her name is Emma Janae. Little Emma has been diagnosed with Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome (HLHS), and will require several procedures and surgeries after she's born. Here is Emma's mommy and daddy's blog. If you're the praying type, could you please lift this sweet little family in prayer? They seem to be very strong in their beliefs and very organized with what they're doing the day of Emma's birth (tomorrow), and that's really great... but we NICU mommies know that it's much scarier when you're actually IN the throes of NICU life than when you're just planning for it.

If you're NOT the praying type, happy, positive thoughts would definitely help them out a lot too.

And, Papaw's funeral is tomorrow as well. Please keep my family in your thoughts and prayers as we say goodbye to one of the world's greatest men.

Friday, October 01, 2010

My papaw, part two.

My sweet papaw passed away Thursday, September 30th. I know he is dancing with the angels tonight.

"But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint."
Isaiah 40:31

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

9 months

***We interrupt this possible-blogging-hiatus to bring you my sweet little angel-man's 9 month update!***

Dear Dylan,

Today you are 9 months old. Good heavens, son! Time just will NOT slow down for anything! What have you been up to this month?

~You are wearing 6-9 month clothes and size 3 diapers.

~Not sure on your weight/height because you haven't been back to the doctor yet (loving this stretch of no-doctor-ness). You were supposed to have an EGD done twice this month, and both times it got postponed (once by me, once by them). Supposedly you're supposed to have it next month now, but insurance is playing a fun game called "let's don't pay for anything because we think Dylan had insurance before this insurance, even though he really didn't," so we will probably have to postpone again until that's all taken care of.

~You're still working on the prop-sitting, which you're totally not a fan of. Your new OT also has you picking up toys from the ground and bringing them up, which is new for you (unless YOU feel like doing it, of course)!

~You've acquired the loudest, fakest cry ever, which you employed the ENTIRE time the new OT was at our house last time. It wasn't pretty.

~You still do tons of babbling, but still no "mama"... every time I ask you if you can say "mama," you give me the most ornery grin you can muster, like "Oh, you'd like that, wouldn't you? Ain't happenin'."

~Grandma is determined to teach you Korean words, which I think is awesome.

~You still love going to visit your grandma every day, and she loves it when you and brother show up!

~Speaking of brother, you just love him... you love to watch him... but you're slowly but surely starting to figure out that if you fuss while brother's around, brother tends to get in trouble. I have a feeling you're going to be a turkey! A lovable, huggable, kissable, ORNERY turkey!!

~You (and brother, of course) continue to be the love of our lives.

Monday, September 27, 2010

And now, goodnight....

I'm toying with the idea of not blogging anymore. I've blogged for many, many years. It all started on blurty in 2002. My sister and her friends had blurty accounts, and I somehow got talked into the blogging world. Then I switched to livejournal. Then xanga. And now here. I've always enjoyed getting my thoughts out via a blog, but it has never been a way for me to completely express myself. I try not to, but I somehow always manage to write like someone's going to read it instead of just writing what's in my head the way I'm thinking it.

The road I walk now is very different than the road I started out on when this blog was born... and worlds away from the path I was taking back in the blurty/livejournal/xanga days. I'm older. I'm wiser. Mostly just older, but whatev. I don't have time to update all the time, and even though I do not (and never will) get money from my blog, I still somehow feel obligated to update it every once in a while. When something becomes an obligation and not a "want to," that's not good, right?

Bottom line? I love my life. I do. I love my children. And I want people to enjoy reading about my life and children if I choose to write about them... but I hate the feeling of writing FOR whoever's out there and craving their response to what I write... and what's more, being disappointed when people DON'T respond.

So... should I stop blogging? Should I just turn off comments? What are YOUR thoughts on the matter? (And this is NOT a plea for attention... I'm 30 years old.. pleas for attention are SO back-when-I-was-21. heh)

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Dear Dylan,

You know that new fake-cry-scream thing you've acquired? Yeah. Stop that. Super annoying.

But hey, it's pretty awesome that you already respond to "no-no!"

Loves and kisses,

Your mommy.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

My papaw

This is my Papaw. And a very teensy little M. My papaw is one of THE best men on the planet. I double dog dare you to challenge me on that fact. He's quiet, reserved, but secretly hilarious and fully equipped with one-liners and zingers that you wouldn't expect to come out of him. He's strong, kind, generous, and loving. People love my papaw after being around him for only a short while... not because he's outgoing, because he's not. It's because he has one of those souls that radiates goodness.

My papaw has leukemia.

My papaw, his doctors, and my mom (and her brothers) have come to the decision not to move on with treatment.

My papaw is dying.

Dear Papaw,

I'm coming to visit you in the next week. Please hold on. I want you to hold my babies one more time (Dylan for the first time, actually). I want your good-soul-radiation to get on them. I want them to be just like you. The world needs lots of men just like you. I hope you know how much I love you. I hope you know that my distance has never been because of something YOU did. I hope you know you still owe me for the tolls to get to your house. (Inside joke!)
I love you. That phrase doesn't seem adequate enough. I want you to be happy in Heaven with my Mamaw (I know she's anxiously awaiting you!), but I'm so, so very sad for me. Just hold on for me. Please?
Your Granddaughter.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Letting the consciousness stream. Or.. something.

This has been a long week, even though technically it was a short week. First grade is wearing me down. I feel like a floppy fish out of water. I'm trying, though, and I think I'll get used to it.

Dylan was supposed to have an EGD done on Thursday, but I postponed it til toward the end of the month. Dylan has a bit of a cold right now, and with his nose being so stuffy and/or runny in the mornings especially, I didn't feel good about him being sedated. The thought of it was very unsettling. Hopefully he'll be good to go by the 23rd, which is the new date.

Dylan also had his last appointment with his current OT. Her husband is in the military, and he's being stationed at Fort Bragg in North Carolina. They're slated to move next week. We are sad to see her go. But we met the new lady that will be coming over, and she's really nice. She's a former high school special ed teacher.

They (his now former-OT and his new one) were impressed with Dylan's new-found prop-sitting skill. I'm excited to see where he goes and what he does next.

The big boy is doing well. He's ornery and naughty at times (most of the time), but he's still sweet(when he's sleeping). Today he was in Dylan's room, and he somehow managed to pull Dylan's dresser completely over. I've praised God about a trillion times that Michael wasn't hurt at all, and that Dylan was napping in his swing in the living room....because about 30 minutes earlier, Dylan was in the room with Michael, lying on the floor playing while they both watched Elmo on DVD. I'm so thankful that neither of them were hurt, but it shook Michael up pretty badly. He came out screaming and shaking... I held him, hugged him, gave him big kisses on his tear-stained cheeks, and asked him if he was okay. He said "Yes, I'm okay, but the DRESSER FELL DOWNNNNNN." I see that, sweetie. hehe

I'm glad it's the weekend, but I have a lot to do. I think my house is about to explode with dirty laundry. It would be pretty embarrassing to see my undies and big M's socks flying through the neighborhood because our laundry room exploded. Tomorrow is our niece's birthday (party... her actual birthday is Sunday), and she'll be 5. I can't believe she's already 5. That was THE fastest 5 years ever. Happy birthday, Tori!

It's way past my bedtime right now. Goodnight, friends.

Monday, August 30, 2010

Dear son

Today you are three years old. I cannot believe I've been on this journey with you for this long.... but it seems like you've been a part of my life forever. Either that, or I just don't remember (or care to remember) what life was like before you.

You are so very funny. You say hilarious, random things every single day. You amaze us with your sense of humor. You are also very head-strong, expressive, and dramatic. When your daddy and I are disciplining you, one of us is usually behind the scenes laughing our guts out at your reaction or response... it's so hard to be mad at you!

And oh, how you love your little brother. When we first brought him home after the month away from you, you didn't want anything at all to do with him... and you didn't want ME to have anything to do with him, either. It took a while, but you learned to adore him. You are so helpful.. you'll bring him a toy when he cries.. pat his head or hand to cheer him up... you worry about him when he doesn't seem happy. You come with me each night to put him in bed, and the way you whisper "Goodnight, Brother. I love you!" melts my heart so much, it's bringing tears to my eyes just typing about it.

Sure, we could live without the talking back, the meltdowns, and the testing-your-boundaries defiance. But we know these days will be gone soon, and we'll actually look back on them and long for them. I know one day, when I'm sitting in a stuffy auditorium watching you walk across the stage with your diploma, I'll wish I had my wiggly 3-year-old back, big brown eyes shining and so much love in his little heart.

You came in this world like a tornado, and you haven't stopped spinning since. Thank God for your strong will and strong spirit... I know it will take you far in life, even if it tests our patience daily.

Little boy, I am so excited to watch you grow up and see what you'll become. My dream for you is that you are a happy, well-adjusted, well-liked man one day. I hope you love God and love your wife and your children, and that you follow a career path that you love. I hope one day you look back and you remember how much your Mommy and Daddy loved you as a little ornery boy. Most of all, I hope you will watch over your little brother long after your Daddy and I are gone... and I know you will, because your love for him is endless and boundless.

Thank you, sweet boy, for making me a Mommy and your father a Daddy. We don't even want to imagine life without you. I praise God for always knowing what He's doing, and for sending you to us. You've forever changed our lives, just by existing.

Happy birthday, you beautiful little brown-eyed boy.

Time has sure flown.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Eight months!

Dear Dylan,

Wow! Can you believe that you are 8 months old today?! I can't! Daddy and I feel so blessed to get to hang out with you every day. You definitely have us (including big brother) wrapped around your little finger!

What have you been up to?

~Well, there's this:

Yep... you're working on it! You can stay up for a good 5-7 seconds before you tumble sideways! It's a start!

~This month you've started staying with your grandma during the day. You fussed when I left for the first couple of days, but now you're doing great! You love spending time with your grandma, and she loves spending time with you! She reports that you are really wanting to crawl... we've seen that too! You get in the crawling position (except the arms), and we can tell you want to take off. Just gotta get those arms stronger!

~At your last appointment with the gastroenterologist, you weighed an even 15 lbs. We think you've grown since then, and that was only about 2 weeks ago!

~Unfortunately, starting today, Mommy is giving up breastfeeding. :( You never have gotten the complete hang of it, which was fine when Mommy was home with you... I could pump all day at any time of the day I wanted to. Now that I'm working, I'm not pumping as much, my supply is going way down fast (yes, even with Fenugreek), and I'm becoming very frustrated with the whole thing. We've been giving you formula here and there to make sure it doesn't upset your tummy... so far, so good. You're responding really well to it (unlike your big brother, who was allergic to the first 2340293482098 kinds we tried). I'm disappointed that things are going this way, but I'm also super proud. I'm proud that I made it to 8 months. I gave up with big brother after just a couple of weeks. I'm proud that I kept pumping when you never got the hang of breastfeeding completely for all these months. I'm proud that I sustained your life on nothing but my milk for 8 whole months (we tried solids for a while... you never acted interested... we'll pick it up again now that you're a bit older)... that I gave you chunky rolls all over your body... that I gave you a good start in life. I'm proud of us for going through all we've been through.

~You are a babbling machine these days! "Dada" is definitely your babble of choice. You've been experimenting with the volume of your voice a lot, lately. You can get pretty loud, there, mister!

~You've also picked up the art that is fake crying! Anytime someone leaves the room, you fake cry. As soon as they walk back in, you stop and smile! Like I said, you've got us ALL wrapped around your little finger!

Saturday, August 21, 2010


Friday was our first day of school.
My first day of teaching first grade.
And if first impressions mean anything whatsoever,
I think that some people were meant to teach such little people.
And some people were meant to put the fear of God in 3rd graders (or older).
I, my friends, am the latter.

I don't want to dread going to work, so I'm praying that Friday was as bad as it's going to get, and Monday will feel more structured and less...... tearsy?

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Little M's new haircut, and my week.

So, our oldest dude took his dear, sweet time growing out his hair. We were afraid he would be hairless until college. But, of course, he started growing hair about 6-8 months ago, and grew the cutest, wildest, mad-scientist-lookin'-est hair you've ever seen.

I often referred to him as my Little Barometer, because his hair would be wild and crazy on hot, dry days... and super curly on humid days. One look at his head would tell us what the weather was like! :)


We've known for the past few months that he has needed a haircut. Now that his grandma is watching him every day, she threatens every day to cut it herself. So we knew it was time, before Grandma grabbed the scissors. hehe

He was actually pretty excited about getting a haircut at first... before he was actually IN the chair.

And then? He was not so very cool with the idea of a haircut anymore. The crocodile tears started flowing.

He used the cape as his personal tissue.

But... after all was said and done, he is the proud new owner of a Big Boy Haircut!


All week long, I've been up at my new school. Oh, did I mention I got moved to a different school? I knew that it was a possibility that I would, since I was coming back from medical leave and all. The story in and of itself is one that kind of makes me mad, but we'll suffice it to say that I'm at a new school (school starts Friday the 20th), and so far I'm liking it. I inherited a classroom that was a teacher's room for 30 years. And, well, there was 30 years worth of "stuff" in it. My friend Lori came on Monday of this last week, and thank GOD she did! I got there and nearly curled into a ball in the corner. Not only am I teaching a grade I'm unfamiliar with (first grade), but I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of all the stuff that was left in that room! She was so helpful in organizing all the manipulatives, center activities, leveled readers, and books. That was so much help, you have no idea. The rest of the days I was on my own, and there was tons of cleaning, filing, organizing, etc. Finally, after all of that, my room is decorated and ready. All I need now are the names of my students so I can fill out their desk tags and name tags. Oh, and a plan on what the heck I'm supposed to be teaching in first grade. There's that.

So, pictures of my new room in the next few days. I won't be back up there until Tuesday, since Dylan has OT Monday morning, and a GI appointment in OKC later in the day.

Bonus pic of Dylan waiting for his Daddy and brother's turn in the barber chair. (Oh, he says "DADA" now! His first word! <3)

Saturday, August 07, 2010

Parenting 101

You know what? I'm getting tired of seeing the things I'm seeing online. I see these "mommy bloggers" that people are actually idolizing like they have all the answers. Sure, they're entertaining to read, and some have some neat ways of engaging you in their little lives, but some are just taking it a little too far. Same with websites and forums dedicated to a certain parenting style. I see mothers saying almost verbatim that if you don't feed your children the crunchy foods they feed their kids, or wear your baby like they wear theirs... or breastfeed your baby/toddler like they do theirs, then as a parent, you are NOT AS GOOD.

My first issue with this is that... hello? These people are ON THE COMPUTER (or their phone) more often than they aren't. They are constantly posting, twittering (or tweeting or whatever the word is), or facebooking (or whatever other social networks are out there). So exactly WHEN are they doing all this excellent parenting?! If they're truly tv-abandoning or truly homeschooling or truly doing the things they claim, where do they get their extra hours in the day? I know that when I sit down at the computer, not only do I blow more time than I intend to, but I know that I can get very little else done whilst browsing blogs and facebook. That's why I do try to limit my Internet time to when the kids are napping or in bed, or when the hubby's home and is giving me a few seconds to myself before I head out into the fire-that-is-small-children again. I'm woman enough to admit that I don't get much done when computer time is involved. So you won't see me preaching to the masses about This Is How You Should Be Parenting/Mothering/Doing Things Because I Have The Answers And The Perfect Home Life And You Don't.

My other issue with it is... there are some mommies reading these blogs out there that truly think these folks have this mommy business all figured out. They look at their blogs with their gorgeous pictures, and the children on these blogs look so happy and content. Their clothes are designers that we regular folk have never even heard of. The owner of the blog preaches on what SHE does to make these children so happy and content. What she does NOT preach about, however, are those moments when her kids are having meltdowns and she wants to pull her hair out (SURELY that doesn't just happen in MY house!), or the arguments she has with her husband about money, who should be doing what around the house, etc...(surely THAT doesn't just happen in my house, either!). and she sure wouldn't fess up to having an issue with spending too much money on those designer clothing she's bought for her perfect children! Maybe she's even living beyond her means and creating a credit problem just to keep up with appearances. (Not saying that all the mommy bloggers can't afford what they show on their blogs... but I have a hard time believing that they ALL can!)

Let me just offer this to whoever's out there reading this: Whether your children wear these designers or whether they're wearing Geranimals: You're doing it right. Whether you feed your children homemade nut butter on home-baked whole grain bread, or peanut butter from a jar on white bread.. you're doing it right. Whether you homeschool or send your kids to public school: You're doing it right! Whether you wear your baby in a wrap on your body or push your child in a stroller: YOU'RE DOING IT RIGHT! Whether you choose to breastfeed or bottle feed: You're doing it RIGHT!! Whether you stay at home with your children or go to work: YOU ARE DOING IT RIGHT! Whether your pictures are taken from the fanciest camera out there and you have a flair for artsy pics, or whether your pictures are taken from a Kodak Easy Share and half your kids' heads are cut off in the pictures: YOU'RE DOING IT RIGHT! Basically, as long as you're feeding, clothing, sheltering, and schooling your children in some way-- YOU ARE DOING IT RIGHT. Please don't let the mommybloggerland make you think otherwise. The point of parenting is not for everybody to take the same road... but to get to the same destination: Happy, healthy, well-adjusted children who will look back on their childhoods and remember all the love that their mommy (and daddy) gave to them.

Wednesday, August 04, 2010

Ds Mamas...

... last time I took D to the doctor (a week or so ago), I told her about the geneticists recommendation that he visit an opthamologist before his first birthday. Her reply was "why?" ... and I just couldn't even remember why! She went ahead and referred him to one, and we have an appointment in November, but here's my question: Did your child see an opthamologist in his/her first year? What are they looking for? I think I remember reading some time that babies with Ds are proned to cataracts... did I read that or is my brain making that up? lol ALSO, anybody else's little one born with a PFO? At about what age were you referred to a cardiologist to see if it closed up or not? His doctor doesn't seem concerned about it yet, and he's doing fine... she couldn't even hear his murmur this last time... but I'd still kind of like to know if it's there or not, ya know? *Note: I could totally look the answers to these questions up on some website or in my Ds manual thing, but I like to hear real-life answers from real-life people going through the same things I'm going through... don't you?*
One more question before I leave you guys alone.... I've been looking at several of your blogs, and your sweet little angels look so strong! I know my Dylan has come lightyears from where he was, but he still just seems so floppy to me in so many ways. I work with him every single day, and I do what the OT tells me to do, but there are some things that he just simply refuses to do. We practice sitting up every day, but he refuses to straighten his back and lift his head, and often just flops himself over or twists his legs so he doesn't have to sit up. We sit up in the bumbo, but the same thing happens. (He's very stubborn... sweet, perfect, lovable, but stubborn! hehe) So could you tell me what YOU'RE doing to make your guys/gals stronger... specifically back, neck, and arms?

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Seven Months

Dear Dylan,

Today, you are 7 months old. I cannot believe it was seven months ago that I was nervously riding in the car to OKC, anxious to meet you but feeling so nervous and underprepared. Seven months ago when you surprised me by being so tiny (only 5 lbs even) and having a little sprig of blond hair. Gosh, it was most definitely love at first sight. What have you been up to this month?

~You are still wearing a size 2 diaper.
~ 6-9 month clothes fit you best, but 3-6 month clothes still fit fine too.
~You have become more expressive...lots of smiles and giggles, which we love.
~You are a moving machine! You've perfected this little scoot thing where you put your legs under you like you're wanting to crawl, and then just push yourself forward. Your arms do almost none of the work, so it's like a worm scoot. SO so cute!
~This month, you've perfected rolling... sure, you've been rolling for a while now, but you would flip one direction and then flip back the same way you came. Now you can roll from either direction and you actually get places!
~Your 6 month well-baby appointment is today, so we'll know then just how much you weigh and how long you are. *Edited to add: You weigh 14 lbs, 14 oz... and you are 25 inches long!*
~Your new obsession? Trying to suck your thumb while you're eating... whether it be from the breast or the bottle, you try to suck both the thumb and the nipple at the same time... lol
~The foods you've tried so far (other than rice cereal) have been green beans (loved 'em!), sweet potatoes (eh...), squash (loved it!), and turkey (loved it!) So far, you aren't showing a huge need to "eat" very often... so we just do a feeding of one of these above mentioned foods once a day or once every other day. You're perfectly content with the breast milk.
~You're getting stronger every day! We didn't know we could have so much love to give to you and your brother. You're both my world, and I just love you so much!!

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

a case of the blah's.

I'm going to (try to) make this short, because 1) it's late; and 2) I have things I need to do. Like put the stuff from the washer to the dryer, since the Nameless Somebody who also lives in the house who is over 3-ft tall said he'd help, but did not. (Oh, not you honey! hehe... that... other... person. :) )

I've been feeling the "blahs" a lot lately. Partly because I have to go back to work. I do miss being with my students and having adults to talk to, but obviously I'd rather be with my babies.

But part of it is because of the trail-of-ex-friends that having a baby with special needs seems to create. One particular person is a person I looked up to so much. She meant SO MUCH to me. We haven't spoken in about 5 or 6 months now. I would have never, EVER guessed that I would have lost this person as a friend. I did my best to keep her and my closest friends informed of the goings-on while D was in the hospital. I answered as many texts, phone calls, and FB messages as I could. Granted, I answered them on MY time, because, well, my child and his care came first. Life was consumed with sitting in a NICU room waiting to talk to doctors, pumping, finding out/waiting for the next plan of action. That stuff came first, and I do not regret that. My truest friends understood that. I don't know if she felt like I left her out of things, but SURELY she would realize that my child had to come first.

Truly, though? It's her loss. She's missing out on the best baby ever. He's a happy, content little fella with a smile that will melt even the hardest of hearts. I'm losing out because she was someone I just really thought the world of... but SHE's missing out even more.

I don't expect pity or sympathy or anything like that. I just needed to type this out. Tomorrow's another day, and hopefully I don't feel so "blah"ish.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Who cares, Amy? (I do, that's who.)

1) The littlest member of our family had his first encounter with green beans tonight. He DEVOURED them!
He still has a hard time sitting up in his bumbo without his neck flopping his head back or to the side, but he seemed to sit a little straighter for the green beans! He's his mama's child... loves the grub!

2) The bigger boy has decided to be the poster child for "Terrible Threes is the new Terrible Twos." He'll be 3 next month, and he's making 2 look like child's play.

3)I am, however, enjoying his ever-developing vocabulary and his imagination and his inquisitiveness. I love his attention to detail and his awesome memory. Right now his obsession is with the Corpse Flower that's blooming at the Houston Museum of Natural Science. We watch Lois on webcam, and he just LOVES checking up on the "stinky fwower" several times during the day. If one of Lois' caretakers happens to be misting water on her or messing with her in any way, he's quick to yell out "JUST LOOK! DON'T TOUCH!" (wonder where he's heard that?! hehe)

4) His new obsessive conversation starter is "Excuse me, Miss..." Example: "Excuse me, Miss, have you seen my sippy cup?" "Excuse me, Miss, wanna watch cartoons?" Another thing he's picked up somewhere is the dramatic teenagery word "FINE." "Do you want to watch Dinosaur Train?" ~*sigh* FINE. lol

5) One day this past week, I let the phrase "shut up" slip out of my mouth in front of him. (It wasn't to him. Or to anybody. The dogs were barking at the folks putting the roof on the neighbor's house, and I said I wished they would shut up.) He immediately furrowed his eyebrows at me, and said "THAT is an UGLY word." He's very right, and I apologized to him. Also, he was being naughty one day while I was changing his clothes, and I got a little loud with him.... his response was "Don't yell! Just talk!" (Again, wonder where he got that?)

6) I have been putting off the visit to the doctor's office for Dylan's 6-month checkup. I know I need to get him in there, but I just am not looking forward to all the shots and bloodwork that I know will accompany the visit. *sigh*

7) Oh. And, I have to go back to work. We're just barely getting by with what my husband makes... especially since he now has all 4 of us on his insurance, which costs an arm and a leg. We tried... we made it quite a while... but I don't see us making it for the long haul. So off to work I go. I feel better now that D is bigger and we're not in and out of doctors' offices so often, but I would have loved to be home with my kids for a few years. *sigh* I guess it just wasn't the plan laid out for me.

Friday, July 09, 2010

The post that was supposed to be made yesterday.

My eyes and body and brain are so tired, it took me about 230498098 tries to type the title.

Yesterday (July 8th) was our 5th wedding anniversary. We spent it having fun as a family. We figured yesterday would be THE perfect day to go to the OKC Zoo. The forecast called for heavy rains in the afternoon, and we figured that meant it'd be nice and cloudy in the earlier part of the day. We were wrong and right... at first it was super sunny and hot and muggy... but then the clouds rolled overhead and it was nice! Being the awesome people we are, we totally forgot the camera. So the only pictures we have were snapped on DH's phone.
I just about had a heart attack when this squirrel got so close and chummy with little M, but little M LOVED it! When the squirrel thought better of his choice in friends and ran away, little M chased him yelling "Come back squirrel!! WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!"
Of course, that isn't Dilly's sippy. And it's dirty because little M decided that the ground was a good place for it when we stopped for Dylan to have a little snack. All that aside--here's Dylan riding an elephant statue. :)

Michael petting a rhino statue. And my extremely white leg.

With the exception of the bats (which he LOVED) and a few of the birds, little M wasn't all that jazzed about the animals. Instead, he had fun collecting things from the trails. Leaves, mainly. And a rock or two. But he loved, loved, loved being outside and playing all day! Dylan enjoyed riding in the stroller... catching a few z's here and there, or just happily kicking his legs and chewing on his hands. He didn't make a single peep the entire time we were in OKC, other than happy babbles. Such a happy baby!!

After the zoo fun, we went to a barbeque place for a late lunch/early dinner. Soooo yummy. If you're ever in Bricktown, and you're going to the movies or just hanging out there, I recommend Earl's BBQ. Specifically, I recommend the sliced brisket. Michael and I discovered it by accident while D was in the NICU (toward the beginning-- we knew where nothing was (except Bricktown), and we were itching to get out to eat something other than hospital cafeteria food.), so maybe it just holds a special place for us because of that, but their brisket really is delish!

We are so blessed. Blessed with two beautiful babies. Blessed with 9 years of being together--5 years of being married-- almost 3 years of being parents together. We just took it all in yesterday. Everyday, really.

Thursday, July 08, 2010

Schnoodles, anniversary preview, cute kids.

I cut my dogs' hair myself.
I'm not good at it, but I don't care.
I am super cheap that way.
Two of them have been to the groomers in our previous life (BC... before children). The other has been a victim of my haircuts his entire life.

That being said, no laughing at their haircuts. It's been rainy and gross here, and you know curly-heads and the humidity. Right... blame it on the humidity...

This is Rocky. Rocky is the youngest. Rocky is scared of everything. His shadow, other animals, butterflies, people's voices, cameras... there's nothing Rocky is NOT scared of, come to think of it. But he's very sweet and very gentle.

This is Sammy. Sammy is the tough talker. He's the alpha dog in the backyard... or at least he fancies himself the alpha dog in the backyard. Rocky concurs, of course. He looooves him some fetch. If you come to my house, don't ever play fetch with him. He will NOT.LET.YOU.STOP.

Last, but most certainly not least, is Daisy. This is a horrendous picture of Daisy... she refused to let me take her picture. I had to trick her to get THIS shot, and she hid shortly after it was snapped. She's just moody like that sometimes. Daisy is the attention seeker. She will come when you call ANY of the dogs' names, or your child's name, or just yell out "Hey Stinky!" and she'll come. Any human word = "Daisy, come here, I want to pet you" to her. There's a downside to her friendliness... and that is JEALOUSY. She is super jealous when you show the other dogs any attention. And? She pees when she gets excited or scared. But don't tell her I told you... I'm sure she doesn't want her bladder control issues broadcast on the Internet.

Those are my pups. I kinda like 'em. Sometimes. :)


It's after midnight, so it's officially tomorrow, which means it's officially my 5th wedding anniversary. I'll write more on it tomorrow... hopefully. :)


I shall leave you with cuteness a la my children.